” What lies before us, what lies behind us, is nothing compared to what lies within us.”
Ralph Waldo Emerson
This message comes from some inspirational experiences with a man most of you would have heard of, the big ‘T,’ Mr. Anthony Robbins. It’s a lesson I feel incredibly passionate about sharing because it shifted my patterns of self-sabotage. For us women in business, this can be the major faculty for holding us back in life, business, relationships, and in all that we do. The times I would write my ‘to-do’ lists and never follow through. The moments I would find reasons to avoid the very work that would take me to my goals and dreams (sometimes without even realising it!) and this self-sabotage was all related to the major limiting beliefs that I had created for myself, about myself. These are real-life problems for any growing entrepreneur! No matter where you are in business today, I know that you too carry some of your very own burdens and limiting beliefs that have stopped you from achieving your greatness. I hope this blog comes as a reminder that you can make any of the necessary changes to go and reach your potential and goals. First, we need to find your point of leverage.
The change you are seeking will be within yourself, but it might not necessarily be about your business goals. Perhaps you are searching for change in a behavioral pattern that’s preventing you from reaching your potential? Or an emotion that’s hindering your success? A relationship with someone or something that isn’t serving you to be the happiest you could be? Or maybe its related to your health, weight, and finances? Whatever area in your life that hasn’t seen you reach your breakthrough, the truth is changing is never a matter of ability, it’s always a matter of motivation. Throughout my journey, I’ve suffered countless years of procrastination, poor money mindset and an emotional connection to food. Its been an addiction for satisfying my emotional needs ever since I can remember. Whether I was happy or sad, I would eat unnecessarily, spend money (I didn’t have!) or procrastinate for hours on end. I know I am still on my mission to mastering and conquering these habits, however, being aware of them has ultimately given me the power to take control. These all relate to our six human needs which help us to understand why we do what we do ( I will speak about all of these in future blogs).
So think about it, what are your current limiting beliefs or behaviors that are affecting you in life and business today? Something you might think about a lot, even talk about a lot, you might also be aware of it at a subconscious level, but you’re stuck in the same limiting patterns.
Like anything, when it’s a negative behavior, it can have a catalyst effect in all areas of our life. I know for me when I wasn’t following through on what I said I would do, it would fill my mind with self-sabotaging thoughts and negative beliefs which would put me into a spiral of procrastination. We can all make a plan with the best of intentions, but without enough leverage for change, the reality is nothing will change. It’s about making something a MUST in your mind, your body, your emotions, and your nervous system. The very reason many of us struggle to follow through with what we say we are going to do is that, on the one hand, we want to change because we are not completely happy, but on the other side, we are afraid that change in itself might be painful. Or even worse we might go through the whole process, and it still might not work which makes us feel incredibly disappointed, and so we avoid at all cost.
I want to help you source your leverage point. There are two things to master to create enough leverage. First, it’s about creating enough association to massive, immediate and unbearable pain in NOT making a change. Secondly, it’s about creating enormous, immediate and extraordinary pleasure by making the change.
I am going to briefly take you through a process that I experienced in person in the hope it can move you, help you break through your limiting beliefs and empower you in the ways it did for me. It’s doesn’t sound too exciting as it can be a painful process at first but trust me- if you do this , and you find your points of leverage, its going to support you in taking the necessary action to achieve the desired results (I would grab a pen and paper to do this exercise).
So think about some of the limiting & negative beliefs/ behaviors that have been holding you back in any area of your life. What are they currently costing you? What experience are you not living today that you could be because of these beliefs? What are these beliefs costing you financially? Who are you letting down? How are these beliefs affecting your decisions and ability to invest in yourself? What are they doing to your self-confidence? Your energy? What kind of role model are you to the people you care about or your children by dragging these limiting beliefs with you? How are they affecting you spiritually, emotionally, physically? FEEL the weight of these emotions and now pull yourself into the future five years from now. Drag them through like a giant snowball getting bigger and bigger, heavier and heavier. Bring every feeling of frustration, anger, pain and negative emotion with you and see yourself looking in the mirror in five years. How do you see yourself? Are you happy? Fulfilled? Healthy? Successful? Proud of yourself? Living the life you dreamed for you and your family? My guess is probably not. This is a reflection of what five years of you giving up your power can look like.
Now step in ten years from now……. ten years of disappointment, what have you given up? How are you feeling emotionally? What life have you left behind because you allowed your self-sabotaging, limiting beliefs to hold you back? What do your children say to you? Has it costs you in your relationships? Family life? Freedom to live life on your terms?
Are you willing to live this way without your power?
The good news is life doesn’t have to look like this, YOU, yes you have the power to do and be anything you want to be! You need to dig deep, make it so painful that change becomes an absolute must and know you can make the necessary changes to your new destiny.
Instead, now focus on empowering beliefs that are going to help you to take the right steps to the life and success you imagined. One where you are balanced, fulfilled, healthy, prosperous, successful, happy, and proud. Write down what it looks like, how it feels, who you are with and the difference you have made. Often, the empowering beliefs will be the opposite to our limiting beliefs so instead of ‘not being good enough,’ you are ‘worthy.’ Grow yourself with as many empowering thoughts, feelings and emotions that will take you closer to your goals.
Now imagine five years from now, what does life look like instead?
Welcome to the first day of the rest of your life!
Where ever you are in business and life, we will always have your back here at Female Success Network. Feel free to join the movement and jump in on our quest to support females all around the world at www.femalesuccessnetwork.com.
Remember it’s your decisions that determine your destiny so never be a victim and keep your power. Your future self-deserves it.
With love always,